THESE ARE THE TIMES THAT TRY MEN’S SOULS

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“These are the times that try men’s souls.” — Thomas Paine, 1776

Recently I have been re-reading the writings of Thomas Paine.  He’s the guy that sparked the American Revolution in 1776.  He started a viral protest against the insanely oppressive government of England, which was the most powerful nation on Earth at that time.  How did he do it?  He published a little pamphlet called “Common Sense” and started passing it out to fellow citizens  like George Washington, Ben Franklin, John Adams and thousands of others.  This, and many other protest in history such as those of Mohandas Gandhi in India and Martin Luther King in the US have been effective, in spite of overwhelming opposition.

Viral protests against government injustice and corporate criminals can be effective. Even the most powerful nations on Earth can’t control the whole population against their collective will. Many have tried and failed.  The current “New World Order” movement is succeeding at global control at an alarming rate. The day the entire population is subject to the will of a few criminals in government and commerce we are doomed. That time has come. The American colonists didn’t have the Internet. But, they also didn’t have global government capable of controlling all the media, the military, our private lives and the economy.  If we want to remain free we’ll have to communicate with each other and act as though our current lives and our future lives depend upon it.

Here is a recent video from The Guardian that illustrates the message in the present moment.

TP, A HISTORY

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Since the dawn of time, people have found nifty ways to clean up after the bathroom act. The most common solution was simply to grab what was at hand: coconuts, shells, snow, moss, hay, leaves, grass, corncobs, sheep’s wool—and, later, thanks to the printing press—newspapers, magazines, and pages of books. The ancient Greeks used clay and stone. The Romans, sponges and salt water. But the idea of a commercial product designed solely to wipe one’s bum? That started about 150 years ago, right here in the U.S.A. In less than a century, Uncle Sam’s marketing genius turned something disposable into something indispensable.

How Toilet Paper Got on a Roll

The first products designed specifically to wipe one’s nethers were aloe-infused sheets of manila hemp dispensed from Kleenex-like boxes. They were invented in 1857 by a New York entrepreneur named Joseph Gayetty, who claimed his sheets prevented hemorrhoids. Gayetty was so proud of his therapeutic bathroom paper that he had his name printed on each sheet. But his success was limited. Americans soon grew accustomed to wiping with the Sears Roebuck catalog, and they saw no need to spend money on something that came in the mail for free.

Toilet paper took its next leap forward in 1890, when two brothers named Clarence and E. Irvin Scott popularized the concept of toilet paper on a roll. The Scotts’ brand became more successful than Gayetty’s medicated wipes, in part because they built a steady trade selling toilet paper to hotels and drugstores. But it was still an uphill battle to get the public to openly buy the product, largely because Americans remained embarrassed by bodily functions. In fact, the Scott brothers were so ashamed of the nature of their work that they didn’t take proper credit for their innovation until 1902.

“No one wanted to ask for it by name,” says Dave Praeger, author of Poop Culture: How America Is Shaped by Its Grossest National Product. “It was so taboo that you couldn’t even talk about the product.” By 1930, the German paper company Hakle began using the tag line, “Ask for a roll of Hakle and you won’t have to say toilet paper!”

As time passed, toilet tissues slowly became an American staple. But widespread acceptance of the product didn’t officially occur until a new technology demanded it. At the end of the 19th century, more and more homes were being built with sit-down flush toilets tied to indoor plumbing systems. And because people required a product that could be flushed away with minimal damage to the pipes, corncobs and moss no longer cut it. In no time, toilet paper ads boasted that the product was recommended by both doctors and plumbers.

The Strength of Going Soft

In the early 1900s, toilet paper was still being marketed as a medicinal item. But in 1928, the Hoberg Paper Company tried a different tack. On the advice of its ad men, the company introduced a brand called Charmin and fitted the product with a feminine logo that depicted a beautiful woman. The genius of the campaign was that by evincing softness and femininity, the company could avoid talking about toilet paper’s actual purpose. Charmin was enormously successful, and the tactic helped the brand survive the Great Depression. (It also helped that, in 1932, Charmin began marketing economy-size packs of four rolls.) Decades later, the dainty ladies were replaced with babies and bear cubs—advertising vehicles that still stock the aisles today.

By the 1970s, America could no longer conceive of life without toilet paper. Case in point: In December 1973, Tonight Show host Johnny Carson joked about a toilet paper shortage during his opening monologue. But America didn’t laugh. Instead, TV watchers across the country ran out to their local grocery stores and bought up as much of the stuff as they could. In 1978, a TV Guidepoll named Mr. Whipple—the affable grocer who implored customers, “Please don’t squeeze the Charmin”—the third best-known man in America, behind former President Richard Nixon and the Rev. Billy Graham.

Rolling the World

Currently, the United States spends more than $6 billion a year on toilet tissue—more than any other nation in the world. Americans, on average, use 57 squares a day and 50 lbs. a year. Even still, the toilet paper market in the United States has largely plateaued. The real growth in the industry is happening in developing countries. There, it’s booming. Toilet paper revenues in Brazil alone have more than doubled since 2004. The radical upswing in sales is believed to be driven by a combination of changing demographics, social expectations, and disposable income.

“The spread of globalization can kind of be measured by the spread of Western bathroom practices,” says Praeger. When average citizens in a country start buying toilet paper, wealth and consumerism have arrived. It signifies that people not only have extra cash to spend, but they’ve also come under the influence of Western marketing.

America Without Toilet Paper

Even as the markets boom in developing nations, toilet paper manufacturers find themselves needing to charge more per roll to make a profit. That’s because production costs are rising. During the past few years, pulp has become more expensive, energy costs are rising, and even water is becoming scarce. Toilet paper companies may need to keep hiking up their prices. The question is, if toilet paper becomes a luxury item, can Americans live without it?

The truth is that we did live without it, for a very long time. And even now, a lot of people do. In Japan, the Washlet—a toilet that comes equipped with a bidet and an air-blower—is growing increasingly popular. And all over the world, water remains one of the most common methods of self-cleaning. Many places in India, the Middle East, and Asia, for instance, still depend on a bucket and a spigot. But as our economy continues to circle the drain, will Americans part with their beloved toilet paper in order to adopt more money-saving measures? Or will we keep flushing our cash away? Praeger, for one, believes a toilet-paper apocalypse is hardly likely. After all, the American marketing machine is a powerful thing.

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The article above, written by Linda Rodriguez, is reprinted with permission from the Jul/Aug 2009 issue of Mental Floss magazine.

 

SHERLOCK HOLMES COMMENTS ABOUT OSCAR WILDE

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“The only thing that sustains one through life is the consciousness of the immense inferiority of everybody else, and this is a feeling that I have always cultivated.”
— Oscar Wilde

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“The most difficult task for the rational observer is to avoid becoming, through empathy or introspection, that which one observes.  This ability, applied, enables a detective to emulate the impulses of the criminal – no matter how insane or counter-survival the result of their behavior might be.  Fortunately, one need not become a criminal in order to fully comprehend the demented universe of these insane creatures!

Many years ago I read about the case of the Irish poet, Oscar Wilde, a man of great intelligence and artistic sensibilities.  The man, although married, with children, who was a respectable person of society, was attracted into a licentious life through association with decadent perverts. It ruined him thoroughly, causing him to lose all that he had gained in reputation, respect, possessions and freedom.

This once great and clever man was cast out from society, and imprisoned to serve for two years of hard labour.  As such, he was removed from contact with the depraved associates who precipitated his undoing.  During the interval of his imprisonment he applied the innate intellect which elevated him above the multitude, to reflect upon the essence of his existence.

Here is a small portion of a letter he wrote to an associate which was published in the London Times obituary notice of his passing:

“When first I was put into prison some people advised me to try and forget who I was. It was ruinous advice. It is only by realising what I am that I have found comfort of any kind. Now I am advised by others to try on my release to forget that I have ever been in a prison at all. I know that would be equally fatal.

It would mean that I would always be haunted by an intolerable sense of disgrace, and that those things that are meant for me as much as for anybody else – the beauty of the sun and moon, the pageant of the seasons, the music of daybreak and the silence of great nights, the rain falling through the leaves, or the dew creeping over the grass and making it silver – would all be tainted for me, and lose their healing power, and their power of communicating joy. To deny one’s own experiences is to put a lie into the lips of one’s own life. It is no less than a denial of the soul.”

I have concluded that criminality, and insanity – forms of the same disease – are contagious.  In human society, as with the cancerous cells of a dying body, a healthy cell can be corrupted or overwhelmed by proximity to or interaction with the cancer.  Therefore, I esteem that it is important to differentiate and segregate the sane from the insane, the healthy from the unhealthy, and likewise, the identification of the spirit with the body.”

— Excerpt from SHERLOCK HOLMES: MY LIFE, by Lawrence R. Spencer

HOW TO HAIKU

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The Japanese haiku and the English language haiku have several critical differences. In Japanese the haiku is composed of 17 sound units divided into three parts – one with 5 units, one with 7 units and another with 5 units. Since sound units are much shorter than English syllables, it has been found that following the Japanese example results in a much longer poem often filled up to make the count with unnecessary words.

The Japanese write their haiku in one line, in order to see clearly the parts of the haiku. In English each part is given a line. This allows the reader time to form an image in the mind before the eyes go back to the left margin for more words. The line breaks also act as a type of punctuation. The kigo, or season word, is a vital part of the Japanese haiku, but in English it is often ignored and not well understood. Therefore, a great number of English haiku do not have a season word and yet are considered to be haiku. The Japanese, because of their longer history of reading haiku, understand that there are two parts to the poem. In English these are called the phrase and fragment. One line is the fragment and the other two lines combine grammatically to become the phrase. Without this combining the two lines together the haiku will sound ‘choppy’ as the voice drops at the end of each line.  (WikiHow.com)